Moving and coping.

Today is the day. The day I move into a new house down university. I was meant to move in a week ago today but due to money I couldn’t go down for Friday so said I would go down Monday.

Sunday evening I had a bad nights sleep. I only had three hours due to major major overthinking. It was so so bad. I just kept thinking of all the possible things that could go wrong whilst moving house. Right from no one being in first to silly things, but big things for me, will my door shut and will I be able to open it again.

There are soΒ many things going through my head right now, so m a n y. I have thoughts such as how is the bathroom door going to be? Will I be able to lock it then open it again? What if my bedroom door is one that jams and I can’t open it ever again? There’s also things like what if my next door neighbours are loud and I can’t sleep when I have work the next morning. These are genuine thoughts running through my head and I seriously wish they would leave so I can just get on with things, as normal.

I do have ways to try and drown out these thoughts however, such as turning up music so I can’t hear them anymore. I do this a lot, if and where I can. I can’t do it whilst I’m at work but… if I’m in the street 9/10 i’ll have headphones on me which I will instantly plug in and use. If I’m at home I will use my speakers and turn up the music louder, just so I’m singing along to something and not thinking about things, over and over and over.

Another thing I will do if I’m home if it’sΒ night time and not always practical to blast music the loudest it’ll go is, I will turn on my fav movie. I don’t watch a lot of films and TV shows as I’m one of those who get easily bored and very quickly. Films such as The Devil Wears Prada, Confessions of a Shopaholic or Mean Girls are films that can be put on without actually thinking about what I’m watching – bonus.

I have also been trying toΒ control Trich, because that is playing up MEGA time. I keep catching myself thinking GOD WILL YOU STOP. It’s got to the point where my arm aches. It’s so sore for being up pulling on my hair. I’ve been using my good old friend the stress ball. I might even give them names I use them a lot. I’ve also had to tie my hair into loads of different bunches so that I don’t pull, they’re harder to pull in a pony tail. I’ve also wet my hair a lot as well as my fingers can’t seem to feel the bad bits like that. It was pay day today so I decided to buy some head wraps, you know try it out and see if it helps. To my surprise they aren’t on the usual sites that I buy clothing/accessories from. I am excited to receive them and will defo report how I get on when I get them through the post.

sunflowers-insta

(I illustrated this the other afternoon, with millions of dots. Copyright applies)

I have however tried to vlog this week (only two days – whoops) but this week has been a crazy one and so many things have happened and changed.

Hopefully by the next time I post I’ll be all settled in the new house and there won’t be anything to worry about – who knows?

 

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